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Retirement Wisdom

Retire Smarter

Personal Development

Say Hello to Your Future Self

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by Bev Bachel

Actor Jim Carrey wrote his future self a $10-million check for “acting services rendered.”

Polar explorer Ann Bancroft spent her days in a walk-in freezer to prepare her future self to ski across Antarctica.

Singer Jennifer Hudson named her dogs Grammy and Oscar as a reminder that she had award-winning plans for her future self.

By focusing on their future selves and their hopes and dreams, these individuals nudged the universe in their favor, and you can, too.

You, only better.

Back when I first began thinking about retirement, I attended a presentation by Kelly McGonigal, health psychologist, Stanford University lecturer, and author of The Willpower Instinct.

During her presentation, she stressed that willpower is a competition between our present self, who acts impulsively to satisfy immediate needs, and our future self, who aspires to be better, someone who
puts our long-term well-being ahead of short-term satisfaction.

She also said that most of us, at some point, throw our future selves under the bus by giving in to what our present selves want right now. Think about it. We all know saving for retirement is important. Yet, about half of households age 55 and older have no retirement savings. [1]

And while everyone says their health is important, 70 percent of U.S.
adults are overweight, which puts both their present and future health at risk. So, how do you bring your present self into focus so you stop putting off the very things your future self will thank you for?

Here are five suggestions:

Let your mind wander. But rather than letting it run wild, put it on a leash by engaging in “positive constructive daydreaming” wherein you plan and rehearse what’s to come, concentrating on playful, empowering activities that will make your future self happy. Where are you? Who are you with? What are you doing? Why are you doing it? Add as much detail as you can.

Name yourself. On New Year’s Day 1999, I attended a “nudge the universe” workshop with two friends. As part of the workshop, we were asked to choose a new name for ourselves that reflected our dreams for the new century. I chose Author Artist, and within 12 months I had signed a contract for my first book.

Solicit input. Ask friends, family, and colleagues what they imagine your future self doing in the years and decades ahead. Do they see you continuing to live in your current home, downsizing to a smaller place, or adding a second home in a different climate? Or perhaps they envision you transitioning from full-time to more flexible work options before you retire completely, or giving up your career altogether in favor of a long-held dream such as becoming a graphic novelist or joining the Peace Corps.

Rethink what you own. We are what we wear, but so often our clothes reflect who we used to be, not who we want to become. And sometimes the homes and possessions that once brought us joy become burdens. One easy way to start letting go of your past self is by asking, “Is this something my future self would wear, own, or enjoy doing?” If not, let it go.

Create a vision board. What do you want your life to be like in the next three to five to 50 years? Cut out words and images from magazines that capture your vision and glue them on poster board. Then, put your vision board where you’ll see it often, ideally each morning when you wake up and each night before you go to bed. Or, create a for-your-eyes-only vision board on Pinterest.

A picture worth 100 years

If you’re looking to have a bit of fun with your future self, try out AgingBooth, a free app that enables you to instantly see what you might look like 10, 20, even 50 years from now. Although the aged photos the app generates are for “entertainment purposes only,” seeing yourself aging well (or looking like hell?) at 75, 85, or 100 may motivate you to do just what McGonigal advises: take better care of your self today.

And for that, your future self will thank you.

Bev Bachel is a freelance writer and the author of  What Do You Really Want? How to Set a Goal and Go for It! A Guide for Teens. She pictures her future self living in Paris.

[1] https://www.thebalance.com/average-retirement-savings-by-age-4155888

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Related Podcast Episodes You May Like

The Future You – Brian David Johnson

Design Your Life and Get Unstuck – Dave Evans

With the Freedom to Retire, Where Will You Plant Your New Tree? – Don Ezra

Hiring a Retirement Coach? Here’s What to Look For

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By Joe Casey

Who needs a retirement coach?  There will be over 3.6 million people in the US turning 65 each year for the next two decades. [1]  And with many pursuing early retirement, there are more people than ever before navigating the transition to retirement.  And there’s a growing cadre of retirement coaches ready to help. But it’s important to hire the right retirement coach for you.

What’s Driving the Growth in Retirement Coaching?

Retirement is a major life transition with a significant emotional component. There’s a growing awareness that retirement is about much more than money. It’s easy to fall into the trap of becoming narrowly focused on saving for retirement while ignoring that you also need to prepare for how to retire well.

Retirement today lasts much longer than in previous generations and a 20 to 30-year retirement is not uncommon. That span requires a smart plan on how you’ll invest your time. It’s becoming seen as a new phase of life offering opportunities for re-invention, rejuvenation, learning, and contribution. In a recent survey, 65% of women and 62% of men reported that they “anticipate retirement as a time to rediscover themselves.” [2]

Retirement is Customized Today – and Often Still Includes Work

Is there a One Size Fits All approach for retirement? Today there’s no one way to retire – and there’s no standard roadmap. You have to chart your own course, which is a great opportunity, but it comes with challenges.  And while retirement used to mean leaving work behind, today it often includes work in some form. According to a survey by the Employee Benefit Research Institute, 8 of 10 workers expect to work for pay in retirement.[3] It’s often not out of financial necessity but for the rewards offered by meaningful work. Because your retirement is unique, the right retirement coach can be a valuable asset.

Retirement comes with opportunity, change, and uncertainty. There are hurdles to jump over and some may come as surprises. You’ll need to think through how to replace some of the benefits that work provided you beyond your paycheck; such as your identity and purpose; how you structure your time; and how you are socially connected.  A study by Age Wave & Merrill Lynch found that on average retirees took 2.5 years before deciding what to do next. [4] If you hire the right retirement coach, it can help you avoid the drift, gain clarity on your direction – and get you to where you want to go faster.

What Does a Retirement Coach Do?

If you just want to kick back, watch TV, travel and play golf in retirement you won’t need a coach. But, if you want more from life, a retirement coach can help you find and realize your vision of a satisfying life in retirement.

A retirement coach helps you plan for the non-financial aspects of retirement. The primary focus is on how you want to invest your time, which is perhaps your most precious asset of all. A good coach can help you expand your thinking, test new options and help you build a portfolio of meaningful activities. Retirement coaching is about thoughtfully designing your next chapter and successfully navigating the transition from corporate life to your new life.

6 Steps to Hire the Right Retirement Coach 

There are more great retirement coaching options than ever before. With so many choices, how do you find the coach that’s best for you? Before you invest your hard-earned money and your valuable time, do a bit of due diligence:

  1. Do Your Homework. What will success will look like if you work with the right retirement coach? Giving it some thought in advance will help you make the right choice. Use a variation of the question highlighted by Carl Richards.  Picture a friend running into you next year and asking you  “Hey, what did working with that retirement coach do for you?” Jot down your initial ideas about how you think it will have helped you. You can clarify it as you go along, but it gives y0u a good starting point for conversations with prospective coaches.
  2. Write a Short List of Criteria. Make a list of what’s most important for you in choosing a coach. How important are factors like their experience and training? Does the coach need to be in your local area or are you open to working virtually? How important is the cost? You’ll find retirement coaching to be far less expensive than you might think. (Insider Tip: Hiring a local coach you can work with in-person isn’t necessarily more effective than hiring a coach who’s better for you working virtually. Work with the one that’s best for you).
  3. Interview Three Coaches. Select three coach candidates to interview. Let each one know that you’re talking with three options and that you’ll let them know your decision. I recommend including different types of coaches. For example, talk with a mix of male and female coaches. Even if you have a preference, include a mix of coaches who work in-person and virtually.
  4. Ask About Their Coaching Approach and Process. Go first. Ask your questions of the coach. Why? You’ll want to see how good a listener your coach is. It’s critical. Ask each coach to describe their approach and how their process works. (Insider Tip: Ask what their process is based on. The answers will tell you a great deal. Look for substance, not buzzwords.) Inquire about how they were trained, and how many clients they have coached. Ask for an example of a recent successful coaching engagement – and ask about for a story of an unsuccessful one and what they learned from it. These questions will help you gauge their training and experience level.
  5. Watch What They Ask You – and What They Don’t. When you turn it over to the coach, pay attention to their questions. Now it’s your turn to listen. What do they focus on and what does that tell you? Are there key things they didn’t ask about that perhaps they should have?
  6. Request  References. Request three references of previous coaching clients you can reach out to. You’ll learn a lot.

Summary

Hiring the right retirement coach can help you design an active, satisfying life in retirement. There are many great options for retirement coaching, but do a little homework, interview multiple coaches, and find the one that’s a great fit for you. Make sure the chemistry and location work, but don’t let those factors limit your choices. Be careful and consider only well-trained, experienced coaches with solid references that can help you create the pathway that’s right for you and your specific goals, priorities, and circumstances. It can make all the difference.

 

Joe Casey is a former senior HR executive who’s transitioned to a second career as a retirement coach at Retirement Wisdom. He holds a Masters in Gerontology from the University of Southern California and works with people to help them discover and design what’s next after their primary career.  He’s the co-host of The Retirement Conversation podcast talking with authors, experts and retirees pursuing interesting Second Acts who share their stories, insights, and lessons learned that can help you in your journey.

[1] (May 30, 2019). How Many People Will Be Retiring in the Years to Come? The Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis.

[2] (April 23, 2019).  2019 Retirement Confidence Survey. Employee Benefit Research Institute.

[3] (September 10, 2018). The Future of Retirement: Bridging the Gap.  HSBC.

[4] (2014). Work in Retirement: Myths and Motivations. Age Wave/Merrill Lynch.

What Can The Rolling Stones Teach Us About Working Longer?

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by Joe Casey

Do you envision working longer after the “traditional” retirement age?

I had a great experience this month going to FedEx Field in the Washington, DC area to see The Rolling Stones in concert. It was surreal to see a band that I first saw when I was 18 in the mid-’70s with my son who just turned 18 last month.

As we entered the stadium, we passed a truck emblazoned Retire Like a Rock Star by a financial industry association who is sponsoring the tour and promoting annuities.  I was thinking ‘I’m not sure I can learn much about retirement from this band still going strong in their mid to late seventies’ But I could certainly learn a lot from them about working longer.

At first glance, there’s not much that most of us have in common with the lifestyles of the band members. But most of us are pondering working longer. According to the 19th Annual Transamerica Survey of Workers, “70% of Baby Boomers either expect to or are already working past 65 or do not plan to retire. Yet, only 40% report that they are keeping their skills up to date.”

The concert was a blast but I also came away with several takeaways that are useful for any of us who want to work longer.

 

1. Love What You Do

On the way to the concert my son peppered me with facts about the Rolling Stones. (“Dad, did you know that they’ve played Jumpin’ Jack Flash on every tour since it came out in 1968? quickly followed by “They must be so bored playing that song!”).

Well, if that’s true, you’d never know it seeing them play it at this concert. They opened with it and their performance was impressive in its high energy. They played for over two hours without an intermission. They are clearly outstanding, highly experienced performers, but they also appeared to be genuinely having fun.

 

2. Pursue Mastery

The day before the concert I was showing my son clips from a Stones concert from the 70s when I first saw them. He was reluctant. He didn’t want to see them in their prime and be disappointed by what he expected to be a band in steep decline. As a young guitarist, he was hyper-focused on the guitar play in the past compared to today. I think he left the event surprised that in some ways he thought that they were even better today.

 

3. Make Smart Adjustments

One thing we all have in common with the band is that we are all aging. While their energy and passion were notable, you could see in the structure of the setlist and how certain songs were performed that they were mindful about setting the right pace. They knew where they could go all out for a sustained period and where they needed to slow it down. Mick Jagger’s recent surgery may have made this a higher priority, but making intelligent adjustments is something we can all relate to and benefit from.

 

4. Prepare to Perform at Your Best

Finally, it takes disciplined practice and preparation to perform consistently at a high level. While that’s true for legendary rock stars, it applies to many of our jobs as well, especially as we stay in the game longer.

 

 

Joe Casey is a former senior HR executive at Merrill Lynch, who’s created a second career as a retirement coach. He holds a Masters in Gerontology from the University of Southern California and, as a retirement coach and Designing Your Life coach, he helps people discover What’s Next after their primary career. 

 

Upgrade Your New Year’s Resolutions – 6 Helpful Tools

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by Joe Casey

Are New Year’s Resolutions passe’?

The eye test says Yes. You see the crowd of new people at the gym on January 2nd, only to see them fade away by Valentine’s Day. Data also backs this up. One survey showed that “only 16.3% of people over the age of 50 achieve their resolutions.” (1)

Why? Most resolutions are based on only one strategy. Willpower. And what we know about willpower is it tends to fade over time. It gets depleted. Dicey.

But resolutions are based on very good intentions and a positive vision of your future. Keep those front and center. What you want to ditch is the singular strategy of willpower. The good news is that there are approaches that can help you turn your vision into reality, including some backed by science.

Are You Willing to Try a New Tool?

So maybe your goals are right, but you just need a new approach. Whether you’re still working, semi-retired, transitioning to retirement or learning how to retire well, there are approaches that I have used and found to be very effective – and a there’s a new one I’m testing this year:

1. Play a Game of Cards

As an Executive Coach, I learn a great deal for my clients. A few years ago, I was working with a CEO of a publicly-traded company who shared with me his approach to planning his upcoming year. Having worked with a number of leaders at his company, and being familiar with what they were working on, I expected Artificial Intelligence, Big Data and maybe a few robots. When I saw his primary tool I was surprised. Index cards. He laid out four index cards labeled More, Less, Start and Stop. On each one he listed four behaviors for the year ahead and then narrowed it down to one each. Simple. That process created clear priorities and set the stage for the new year. While you have to be flexible as things evolve over the course of a year, having a shortlist of behaviors you want to change can be a constant focus throughout.

2. Put Your Big Rocks In First

Achieving your goals ultimately comes down to prioritizing your time. But have you ever felt that you just don’t have time to work on your goals? Life does get in the way. Before we had the distraction of smartphones and Netflix, the late Stephen Covey, who authored the classic best-seller The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,  recommended a great time management approach – schedule your priorities first. Before the other things intrude – and they will. It’s simple and powerful. Here’s a short video demonstrating the principle. My CEO client did this as part of his planning process. He began by writing down on separate cards key dates, personally and professionally, for him in the year ahead. He locked down key meetings, vacations, long weekends, birthdays and special occasions – before other things could get in the way. So get out your index cards and your Google Calendar and lock down your priorities.

3. Try Tiny Habits

When you’re taking on personal change, starting small is smart. It turns out that starting tiny is even smarter. B.J. Fogg, Director, Behavior Design Lab at Stanford University. In his day job, he studies behavior applied to the online world. His research led him to explore how his findings could be applied to personal change and development, creating a three-step Tiny Habits process. The keys are identifying what you want to change or build and then breaking it down into its smallest steps. Next, you anchor the new behavior to something you already habitually do (I started this with doing situps after I brushed my teeth. Starting with one, I progressed to 200 each morning in six-months.) The third part is to recognize your progress right after you perform the desired behavior. A cool process that’s free through his website.

4. WOOP It Up

There’s a ton of science behind this one, it’s fun – and there’s an app.

Gabriele Oettingen is a professor of Psychology at NYU and Hamburg University who has conducted extensive research on motivation, goal attainment, and self-regulation. She developed the technique of mental contrasting, which applies a dose of pragmatic realism to positive thinking. (2) In recent years, she’s developed an accessible version of her research – a four-step process called WOOP. The process entails describing your Wish for the future; the specific Outcome you’re after (and how’ll you’ll feel when you achieve it); the Obstacles you’ll likely encounter, and your Plan to overcome them. It’s versatile and I find it useful for longer-term goals as well as short-term goals. A primary benefit of this process is that it reality-tests your dreams for the future and enhances the level of commitment on the ones you choose to pursue.

5. Implement Your Intentions – In Advance

Dr. Oettingen’s husband, Peter Gollwitzer, is also a Psychology professor at NYU and he developed an evidence-based technique that’s embedded in WOOP. It’s called Implementation Intentions, which is academic-speak for If, Then planning. (3) Here’s how it works. Let’s say your goal is to slim down in 2019. One obstacle you anticipate is avoiding dessert in restaurants. You could take your chances with willpower, but with this method, you would instead set your intentions ahead of time. If people order dessert, Then, I will order fruit. Simple and effective.

6. Set Micro-Resolutions

Maybe setting change goals for an entire year is the problem. The Wisdom Project (no relation…) at CNN recently published a piece recommending an alternative. Flip the script and use the calendar to your advantage. Set a separate area of focus for each month – adding up to progress across the year. I’m trying this in 2019 and will report back.

I hope you’ll test drive one of these turbo-charged approaches and we can compare notes as the year unfolds.

Joe Casey is an executive coach and retirement coach with Retirement Wisdom®.  A former senior HR executive, he’s been quoted in The Wall Street Journal, CNBC.com and Business Insider on career and retirement issues. He writes for The RW blog, a blog about retirement on retirementwisdom.com.

(1) Walker, N. (2018). Embrace Action: Make Personal and Professional Resolutions. AORN Journal, 107(1), 1-4.

(2) Oettingen, G., & Gollwitzer, P. M. (2017). Health behavior change by self-regulation of goal pursuit: Mental contrasting with implementation intentions. In Routledge International Handbook of Self-Control in Health and Well-Being (pp. 418-430). Routledge.

(3) Gollwitzer, P. M., & Sheeran, P. (2006). Implementation intentions and goal achievement: A meta‐analysis of effects and processes. Advances in experimental social psychology, 38, 69-119.

Why Settle for Happiness?

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By Joe Casey

The pursuit of happiness. It’s high on the list in retirement. Everyone wants a happy retirement.

It’s one of the three “unalienable rights” highlighted in the Declaration of Independence. Happiness has also become an industry. Odds are that you’ve read a least one, and probably more, of the countless books or articles published on happiness in recent years.

And it seems that it may be harder to achieve these days – at least around these parts. Among countries, Canada ranks 9th and the U.S. slipped from third to 19th in the 2017 World Happiness Report.

But if you’re “chronologically advanced”, as I heard the comedian Sarah Jones describe it last week, there’s good news.

Unlike a number of things, happiness tends to increase in later life. Several studies (including Blanchflower, D. G., & Oswald, A. J. (2008)) suggest that happiness follows a U-shaped curve, dipping in mid-life and then tending to climb in the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s.

Don't Settle for Happiness. Aim Higher. Cultivate Purpose and Meaning. Click To Tweet

Is That All There Is?

We can all agree that happiness is a good thing. And it’s great to know that it tends to increase in later years. But perhaps there’s a higher level of living to aspire to. A new study by the Stanford Graduate School of Education and Encore.org (Purpose in the Encore Years: Shaping Lives of Meaning and Contribution) found that (only) about 3 in 10 of surveyed adults, 50 and older, expressed that they have “purpose beyond the self”. Purpose was defined as engaging in activities that had meaning to them personally and contributed to the well-being of others.

Often, this is of great interest to many people. But it’s natural to wonder what it really entails and what you’d need to give up. Does purpose involve a high level of sacrifice and total commitment? A key finding of this study is that pursuing purpose is”not a zero-sum game”. People who reported a purpose beyond themselves were found to have a higher level of engagement in other self-oriented activities, indicating that purposeful activities are a matter of “and” rather than “either/or.” Perhaps the most notable finding is that those with “purpose beyond the self” reported higher levels of joy, satisfaction, and optimism. (I’ve never heard anyone complain about having too much of those).

More Joy, Satisfaction, and Optimism? Sign Me Up. Pursue Purpose and Meaning. Click To Tweet

How to Build Purpose and Meaning

How do I find my purpose and strive for greater meaning? Our guest on this week’s episode of The Retirement Conversation podcast, Emily Esfahani Smith, makes a compelling case for cultivating meaning over pursuing happiness. The author of The Power of Meaning, she notes that happiness can be fleeting, while meaning can lead to longer-lasting fulfillment. Emily dispels the perception of pursuing purpose and meaning as lofty and offers practical advice and examples of how it can be nurtured in small ways in daily life.  Emily provides insights from positive psychology research, the wisdom of ancient philosophers, and her own experiences that will be useful to anyone who is interested in developing more purpose and meaning in their lives.

You can listen to our conversation with Emily Esfahani Smith here.