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Retirement Wisdom

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Boost Your Post-retirement Confidence

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By Bev Bachel

I am.

I’m not.

I can.

I can’t.

Confidence—the feeling of self-assurance that comes from appreciating our abilities and accomplishments—often takes a hit in retirement, in large part because we’ve come to rely on our careers to define who we are and bolster our self-worth. Leave the career behind, and many of us quickly feel less confident … and even less capable.

That’s what happened to Sheila Peyraud. After retiring from a challenging yet rewarding career as chief technology officer of a large manufacturing company in which she routinely tackled challenging problems, she found herself at a complete loss.

“I would never have guessed that I had most of my ego wrapped up in my job, but when I retired, my identity disappeared overnight,” says Peyraud. “That made it clear just how much of my self-esteem was tied to my job. I had no idea. It was really a shock, and my confidence took a hit.”

Peyraud’s loss of confidence in retirement is common. According to an American Psychology Association study, self-esteem rises steadily until retirement, then declines just as steadily thereafter.[1]

But it’s doesn’t have to be this way. Instead, with these strategies, those of us who are retired or nearing retirement can turn “I’m not” back to “I am” and “I can’t” back to “I can.”

Here are eight strategies to help reinvigorate your retirement confidence:

Strategy #1: Set new goals. Run a marathon. Build a cabin. Visit all 50 states. Read a book a week. These are just some of the goals people I know have set … and achieved. In the process, they’ve not only grown their confidence, they’ve proven to themselves (and others) that they have what it takes to succeed.

Strategy #2: Learn something new. Podcasts, including the Retirement Wisdom podcast, are a great way to learn. So is going back to school. That’s what Peyraud did; she enrolled in the University of Minnesota Advanced Careers Fellows Program (UMAC), a nine-month, immersive experience [program?] designed for “encore adults” as they navigate transitions in their work and life. Even though the program has ended, Peyraud continues to take one or two classes per semester, on everything from sociology to electrical engineering.

Strategy #3: Connect with others. It’s so much easier to “get up and go” when you have someone to get up and go with. That’s one of the things Peyraud valued most about her UMAC program; it gave her a cohort of professionals who wanted, needed and valued her support while offering their support in return. “I made some good friends along the way, and we continue to stay in touch and cheer one another on,” says Peyraud.

Strategy #4: Home in on your purpose. While Peyraud started out at a loss, she’s since gotten crystal clear on her purpose, which she defines as “being useful to others and continuous self-development.” The first of these she pursues through tutoring, mentoring, and an open attitude toward others; the second through additional University of Minnesota classes, podcasts (Tim Ferris’ and Brené Brown’s are two of her favorites) and random goals such as learning to play the piano.

Strategy #5: Stretch your comfort zone. Initiate a conversation with someone you don’t know. Attend an event by yourself. Travel to a developing country. Go rock climbing or scuba diving. While these things may at first feel uncomfortable—even frightening—they and other stretches eventually become part of your comfort zone, giving you the confidence to stretch ever further.

Strategy #6: Challenge yourself physically. Come up with a physical challenge that’s realistic for you. For one of my friend’s, it’s running her first-ever 10k. For another, it’s playing pickleball. For Peyraud it’s walking four to five miles a day plus strenuous gardening. “Along the way, I’m building my confidence and proving to myself that I have what it takes to succeed,” says Peyraud. She’s also keeping her body as strong as her mind.

Strategy #7: Engage your imagination. Research shows that our brains don’t differentiate between imagining doing something—delivering a TED Talk, for instance—and actually doing it, so amp up your confidence and your skills by engaging your imagination. Close your eyes and picture yourself with as much detail as possible. Where are you? Who is with you? What are you succeeding at? In what ways are people cheering you on?

“I was self-conscious when I first started taking classes,” says Peyraud. “I was often paired with students 45 years my junior and had to find ways to be useful to them—my organizational skills came in particularly handy—without being a know-it-all. I’ve also found that being vulnerable and admitting what I don’t know has enabled me to learn from my fellow students, everything from software skills to intergenerational thinking.

As a result, Peyraud is confident that she is and that she can.

Bev Bachel is a Twin Cities freelancer who is developing her own retirement confidence by writing blog posts for AARP and Retirement Wisdom.

[1] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/changepower/202007/why-are-older-people-happier-less-confident

Aging with Gusto

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By Bev Bachel

Our society shuns aging and favors youth.

That’s no secret, but what should you and I do with this real yet unfortunate truth?

Develop an “aging with gusto” mindset.

“How we think about aging has a big impact on how we age,” says Donna Comer, coordinator/facilitator for Aging with Gusto, a Vital Aging Network program focused on how we can maintain positive views of ourselves and others as we grow older.

Such views can be extremely powerful. In fact, research shows that people with more positive views of aging live an average of 7.5 years longer than those with more negative views.[1]

What’s more, people who perceive their elder selves as a burden to others tend to view their lives as less valuable, which in turn increases their risk of depression and social isolation, both of which have proven to be “silent killers” for older adults.[2]

Positive views matter

“Growing older does offer challenges,” acknowledges Comer. “But raising awareness of aging and increasing appreciation for how people of all ages contribute to our families and our communities is an essential first step in adopting a more positive view of both retirement and aging.”

Comer isn’t the only one who thinks so. So does Jo Ann Jenkins, CEO of AARP and author of Disrupt Aging: A Bold New Path to Living Your Best Life at Every Age. In the book and on the Disrupt Aging website, Jenkins stresses that we’re not only living longer, but better. And we’re defying stereotypes along the way.

That was exactly the point made at an arts and aging conference I attended several years back. The keynote speaker invited volunteers from the audience to join him on stage and to act out what 70, 80 and 90 looked like. The volunteer pretending to be 70 took baby steps as she walked onto the stage. The one pretending to be 80 hobbled with a cane, stopping every few feet to catch his breath, while the one pretending to be 90 relied on a make-believe wheelchair.

Then, an actual 90-year-old (a marathoner, it turned out) came running from the back of the auditorium and hopped onto the stage, instantly shattering the audience’s misperceptions of what “old” looks and acts like.

AARP made a similar point in a video it developed in which millennials were asked to demonstrate what old looks like: struggling to send a text message, inching their way down an imaginary flight of stairs and unable to do even a single pushup. Then, the millennials met with real older adults who were able to perform these and other more ambitious tasks effortlessly.

The millennials were amazed. But they shouldn’t have been. While aging often comes with ageism—the tendency to regard older persons as debilitated, unworthy of attention or unsuitable for employment—the two don’t have to go hand in hand. Nor should they.

That’s the point longevity expert Dan Buettner makes in The Blue Zones: Lessons for Living Longer from the People Who’ve Lived the Longest. According to his research, if you want to add years and perhaps decades to your life, embrace these nine habits:

  • Move naturally.People in Blue Zones live in environments that nudge them to move without thinking much about it, rather than separating fitness into a specific hour of their day.
  • Power up your purpose.Called “Ikigai” by the Okinawans, your purpose gives you a reason to get up in the morning. Find it, and you’ll live about seven years longer.
  • Downshift. People in Blue Zones slow down to pray, take naps, manage their stress, cherish their ancestors and come together for happy hours.
  • Stop eating before you’re full.Eat your smallest meal in the late afternoon or early evening and stop eating when you are 80 percent full.
  • Eat plants. While some people in the Blue Zones eat meat, most don’t. And those who do eat it do so only a few times each month.
  • Drink wine.Blue Zonians drink one or two glasses of wine a day with friends and family.
  • Belong to a faith community. Blue Zones research shows that attending faith-based services four times a month can add up to 14 years to your life.
  • Put loved ones first. Aging parents and grandparents often live near or even in the same home as their children and grandchildren. This lowers disease and mortality rates.
  • Find the right crowd. Those who live the longest are part of active social circles that support healthy behaviors.

To learn more about how you can age with gusto, visit AgingWithGusto.com and BlueZones.com.

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Related Podcast Episodes You May Like

Retirement Planning Includes Getting Good at Getting Older – Rabbi Laura Geller

What Can You Do to Age Better? – Anna Dixon

What Can We Learn from Blue Zones? – Richard Eisenberg

We’re All Ageing. Are You Up for a Bolder Approach? – Carl Honoré

[1] https://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/psp-832261.pdf

[2] https://www.mylifesite.net/blog/post/positive-aging-changing-mindset-growing-older/

Semi-retirement: One Way to Engage in More Meaningful Work

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By Bev Bachel

Years ago, a writer friend told me that when you’re self-employed you never really retire, you just wake up one day and realize all your clients are gone. Thankfully, that hasn’t happened to me, at least not yet, but it has got me thinking about my own path to retirement.

While it’s a few years off, I have made the transition from full-time work focused on what clients ask of me (e.g., write a brochure about trucking software) to part-time work focused on what I enjoy (e.g., write a blog post about intergenerational living).

So, does doing work I enjoy, often without worrying about how much I get paid, mean I’m semi-retired?

Yes.

According to Kate Schaefers, executive director of the University of Minnesota Advanced Careers Initiative—a gap-year program for experienced professionals as they transition from career jobs into more meaningful, post-career lives, semi-retirement—is defined as intentionally working less than full-time, typically doing less stressful and/or more fulfilling work, even if such work pays less.

Take Louis Capecci for example. He retired from his retail career but now manages home improvement projects and vacation properties for others. And while Rob Kirby still works full-time for a Big Ten university, he’s already laid the groundwork for semi-retirement by developing his skills as a freelance writer.

Capecci and Kirby aren’t alone. According to U.S. Census Bureau and the Bureau of Labor Statistics data, 13 million Americans age 65 and older will be in the labor force by 2024.[1]

There are many reasons for this: healthier, longer lives, as well as the need to save more for retirement top the list. “Plus, people are eager to stay engaged, especially when they’re able to do work that’s meaningful to them,” says Schaefers.

Tips to keep in mind

If you’re considering semi-retirement, here are five tips to make the most of it:

  • Take inventory. Schaefers advises asking yourself several key questions: What am I good at? What do I enjoy doing? How can I bring these things together in a way that leads to rewarding work?
  • Network with others. Who do you know who is doing something you find interesting? Connect with them to learn more. “Whether they’re former colleagues, long-time friends or someone you met last week while standing in line at the grocery store, a network of diverse people can help you connect with meaningful work,” says Schaefers.
  • Try things on for size. For instance, if you’re interested in podcasting, can you volunteer to help your neighborhood association or favorite nonprofit launch a podcast?
  • Embrace differences. “We have five generations in the workplace today, yet many of us live and work in age-segregated environments,” says Schaefers. “By reaching out to those who are younger and older, we can fuel both our creativity and productivity.” Plus, when we feel more connected, we tend to perform better.
  • Trust that you’ll figure it out. “You have to be okay with not having all the answers, even with not knowing what you’re doing,” says Schaefers. “At some point, things will fall into place and your future will once again feel bright.”

Bev Bachel is a Twin Cities freelance writer who is making the transition from full-time work to semiretirement.

[1] https://www.bls.gov/careeroutlook/2017/article/older-workers.htm

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Podcast Episodes You May Like

How to Build a Portfolio Career – Kate Schaefers

Are You Ready for The New Long Life? – Andrew Scott

How Life Hacks Can Help Make Your Retirement the Best Time of Your Life – Sam Horn

Why Are People Unretiring? – Nicole Maestas

Retiring? Congratulations! You’ve Got Seniority!

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By Dr. Thelma Reese

“I’m Retired!” What does that mean? The word has definitely lost its meaning. In fact, it’s time to retire the word “retired.” Retirement used to immediately signify either an arbitrary age — usually sixty-five, or whether or not one was still being paid to work. It could imply, however, any one of a whole range of conditions, from having the wealth to maintain one’s lifestyle to physical or mental senescence forcing an end to life in the
workplace; or unwanted termination from a successful career to voluntary withdrawal from a no-longer satisfying one. The term definitely brought with it the suggestion of removal from something and of an endpoint in one’s life — perhaps the signal of a final stage of life.


Today, retirement generally means leaving some kind of paid work — in other words, retiring from something. But using the term is insufficient, however, when it is applied to a time in one’s life. Today, the word needs the accompanying preposition: “to.” We don’t just retire from something; most of us retire to something else. It may even be to another income-producing activity. In fact, just describing oneself as “retired” is embarrassing. It says, “I’ve stopped. I have nothing to do that’s worth talking about. I’ve
disengaged from activity that matters or would be of interest to anyone else.”

What Does Being Retired Look Like?


Images fade slowly. We still can see in our minds’ eyes (and in well-aimed commercials) happy, even complacent old people rocking contentedly; or in more recent ads, vigorous grey-haired seniors playing contentedly, reflecting an inner sense of well-earned serenity and fulfillment, passing time until Forever arrives. And definitely not making waves. Pretty pictures, just before Forever peeks over the horizon, assuring us of our
idealized place and role in society.


For most of us, things changed a few decades before the current upheaval became manifest. The images of being retired were shattered by:

  • Longer life expectancy
  • Increased visibility (our burgeoning numbers)
  • Continued mental energy and emotional development
  • Recognition of the value of our own life experience
  • Concern for future generations
  • Awareness of critical problems affecting everything from our neighborhood to outer space
  • Connecting and contributing in ways we never dreamed of (except in science fiction)
  • Ageism rearing its ugly head Anger at being ignored

In these times, when the world needs all hands on deck, the disengagement that “retirement” once evoked seems wrong. We need to seize the opportunities and meet responsibilities that are here for each of us.

If We Aren’t in Retirement, Where Are We?

Now that we have worked at jobs and/or careers we loved, hated, or tolerated; have raised families or helped others do it, or made our own way on our own; have searched for, found, lost meaning, found it again, or search still; marvel at all we survived; loved, lost, mourned, and loved again, we have arrived at seniority. Not that we earned it; we got here by living. We have arrived at the state of privilege the term suggests.

This place of seniority carries with it an aura of respect — even esteem — that acknowledges experience. The senior partner, the senior officer, the senior student: status and rank are implied in seniority. Also implied is responsibility.

In this age of upheaval, the emerging presence and voice of seniors can be a source of strength, inspiring and merging with the power of the generations that follow. When we listen, engage, and demonstrate the capacity to change we have learned from experience; and when we model resilience, embrace new ideas, and apply the lessons of experience, we are necessary central players in the change our world needs.

Retirement is over. The idleness of retirement is over. The action of seniority has arrived.

Dr. Thelma Reese is the author of The New Senior Woman and The New Senior Man and creator of the blog, www.ElderChicks.com. She’s a retired professor of English and Education, the former spokesperson for Hooked on Phonics, and has long been active in national and Philadelphia-based educational and cultural initiatives. She is the author, with BJ Kittredge, of the new book, How Seniors Are Saving the World: Retirement Activism to the Rescue!

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Listen to Our Podcast Conversations with Dr. Reese

How Seniors Are Saving the World With Activism – Thelma Reese

The Unique Challenges Men and Women Face in Retirement – Thelma Reese

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This article is republished with permission from the author. It was originally published at New Spirit Journal and in Thrive Global.

Say Hello to Your Future Self

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by Bev Bachel

Actor Jim Carrey wrote his future self a $10-million check for “acting services rendered.”

Polar explorer Ann Bancroft spent her days in a walk-in freezer to prepare her future self to ski across Antarctica.

Singer Jennifer Hudson named her dogs Grammy and Oscar as a reminder that she had award-winning plans for her future self.

By focusing on their future selves and their hopes and dreams, these individuals nudged the universe in their favor, and you can, too.

You, only better.

Back when I first began thinking about retirement, I attended a presentation by Kelly McGonigal, health psychologist, Stanford University lecturer, and author of The Willpower Instinct.

During her presentation, she stressed that willpower is a competition between our present self, who acts impulsively to satisfy immediate needs, and our future self, who aspires to be better, someone who
puts our long-term well-being ahead of short-term satisfaction.

She also said that most of us, at some point, throw our future selves under the bus by giving in to what our present selves want right now. Think about it. We all know saving for retirement is important. Yet, about half of households age 55 and older have no retirement savings. [1]

And while everyone says their health is important, 70 percent of U.S.
adults are overweight, which puts both their present and future health at risk. So, how do you bring your present self into focus so you stop putting off the very things your future self will thank you for?

Here are five suggestions:

Let your mind wander. But rather than letting it run wild, put it on a leash by engaging in “positive constructive daydreaming” wherein you plan and rehearse what’s to come, concentrating on playful, empowering activities that will make your future self happy. Where are you? Who are you with? What are you doing? Why are you doing it? Add as much detail as you can.

Name yourself. On New Year’s Day 1999, I attended a “nudge the universe” workshop with two friends. As part of the workshop, we were asked to choose a new name for ourselves that reflected our dreams for the new century. I chose Author Artist, and within 12 months I had signed a contract for my first book.

Solicit input. Ask friends, family, and colleagues what they imagine your future self doing in the years and decades ahead. Do they see you continuing to live in your current home, downsizing to a smaller place, or adding a second home in a different climate? Or perhaps they envision you transitioning from full-time to more flexible work options before you retire completely, or giving up your career altogether in favor of a long-held dream such as becoming a graphic novelist or joining the Peace Corps.

Rethink what you own. We are what we wear, but so often our clothes reflect who we used to be, not who we want to become. And sometimes the homes and possessions that once brought us joy become burdens. One easy way to start letting go of your past self is by asking, “Is this something my future self would wear, own, or enjoy doing?” If not, let it go.

Create a vision board. What do you want your life to be like in the next three to five to 50 years? Cut out words and images from magazines that capture your vision and glue them on poster board. Then, put your vision board where you’ll see it often, ideally each morning when you wake up and each night before you go to bed. Or, create a for-your-eyes-only vision board on Pinterest.

A picture worth 100 years

If you’re looking to have a bit of fun with your future self, try out AgingBooth, a free app that enables you to instantly see what you might look like 10, 20, even 50 years from now. Although the aged photos the app generates are for “entertainment purposes only,” seeing yourself aging well (or looking like hell?) at 75, 85, or 100 may motivate you to do just what McGonigal advises: take better care of your self today.

And for that, your future self will thank you.

Bev Bachel is a freelance writer and the author of  What Do You Really Want? How to Set a Goal and Go for It! A Guide for Teens. She pictures her future self living in Paris.

[1] https://www.thebalance.com/average-retirement-savings-by-age-4155888

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Related Podcast Episodes You May Like

The Future You – Brian David Johnson

Design Your Life and Get Unstuck – Dave Evans

With the Freedom to Retire, Where Will You Plant Your New Tree? – Don Ezra