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Retirement Wisdom

Retire Smarter

Career and Work

Outdated Principles on Retirement on Your Belief Window?

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By Joe Casey

They say when the student is ready, the teacher appears. But sometimes the teacher shows up early and plants a seed.

Twenty-five years ago, I was introduced to a concept that I wasn’t ready to grasp. I was in my mid-thirties, a mid-level HR manager on the way up, with two kids and a long To-Do list. Big plans. Busy schedule. Many irons in the fire. Getting lots of things done. A whirling dervish. You know the type.

Are You Open to a New Idea?

One day, my manager and her manager asked if I’d meet with Hyrum Smith, who was then CEO of the company that made Franklin Day Planners, which we used in a big way in our company. They wanted my opinion on a new idea he had that may be useful in our management training programs. Would I hear him out and opine on how it would fly with our managers?

It was great to meet Hyrum and hear his new idea. He explained that we all have a belief window through which we view the world. Think of it as an invisible windshield in front of your face. On the windshield, we have our beliefs and principles and they alter our view of the world. The problem comes when some of our principles become outdated or inappropriate to our circumstances. They can distort our vision. It’s like trying to drive in a heavy downpour with broken windshield wipers. It’s hard to get an accurate view of what’s in front of you.

I believe I was very polite,  but my reply was that I didn’t think it wouldn’t be right for our managers. (I believe I was thinking about my next three meetings and my To-Do list and starting to hyperventilate).

The truth is I wasn’t ready for the concept.

I was a complete dolt. It took a while for it to dawn on me (years, actually) that my managers didn’t need my opinion on this idea. They thought it was an idea I needed to hear.  Once I finally got it, this became a valuable concept.

Over time, I got used to asking myself “Am I seeing this situation accurately? Or is it because of an incorrect principle or outdated belief on my windshield?” In my primary career, it helped me become more open, less defensive, and start to build a broader perspective beyond my To-Do list.  Today, I often recommend it to my executive coaching clients.

 

What Incorrect Principles Can People Have About Retirement?

Sometimes, we haven’t always reflected on what our beliefs are about retirement. And sometimes they are outdated or incorrect. Here are some that I hear:

 

1. “I Just Need Financial Security”

For years, the message has been clear. People are not saving enough for retirement. Pensions are a relic of the past. Social Security may not be there for you. You’re on your own. Many people have heeded these warnings and diligently saved and wisely invested for their retirement. Yet, this can still be an incorrect principle on the windshield. How? It’s necessary, but not sufficient. You have to plan for how you’ll manage both your money and your time in retirement. Since retirements today can last 20 to 30 years or more, the time element presents an enormous opportunity – or a big risk.

2. “I’m in Control of the Timing of Retirement”

Picture your Retirement as a 4-year-old with his or her hands on the hips, defiantly explaining to you that “You’re not the boss of me!”

In some ways, that can be true. One of those ways is when you retire. There are often circumstances beyond your control that may lead you, or even force you, to retire far earlier than planned. According to the 2017 Retirement Confidence Survey by the Employee Benefit Research Institute, 48 % of retirees surveyed retired earlier than planned, mostly due to hardships, illness, caregiving or downsizing.

Keep in mind that you may not be the boss of the timing of your retirement.

3. “I’ll Figure It Out As I Go”

After a long career, kicking back for a while is appealing. After all, you deserve a break. The question is: How long a break?  Without a solid plan on how you’ll start to invest your time, it’s easy to drift. After a while, the vacation mindset can become your default mode. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it can make your transition harder, if you do decide that work, in some way, is part of your life in retirement. It’s better to stay engaged in some way, leverage your contacts and experience while they are still fresh. You can always leverage a freelance project, consulting role, or volunteer opportunity down the road. While you’re immersed in your primary career, the idea of simply not working is seductive. But as the saying goes, it’s not what you retire from, it’s what you retire to that matters most. It’s a better idea to think that through a bit before you jump. You can be the boss of how you use your time in retirement.

 4. “My Spouse/Partner Wants the Same Things I Do”

We think we know our partners well. And we probably do. But it’s easy to forget that they change too. When you’re leading busy lives, it’s easy to not be fully in synch with their hopes and dreams.

In their excellent book Refire! Don’t Retire, Ken Blanchard and Morton Shaevitz point out that partners may often be at very different phases of life and want very different things in the retirement years. One may be interested in more travel and leisure while the other, after having taken primary responsibility for child-rearing, may now be ready for more career or achievement type of pursuits. It’s important to discuss this openly, without any assumptions getting in the way.

 

The Takeaway

There’s a clear pattern here. All of these incorrect principles are based on assumptions that were probably correct and useful at an earlier time. But if they’re not updated as things change, they can become obstacles. It’s like trying to run your iPhone 8 on IOS 2.3.

What beliefs do you have that might be ready for a Software Update?

 

Postscript

After I started writing this, I discovered that Hyrum Smith recently published a new book, Purposeful Retirement. I’ll be reading it shortly and will post a review on our website. It’s safe to say that I’ll be trying to absorb his wisdom right away this time around.

Joe Casey is an executive coach and retirement coach who also helps people think through and create their Second Acts, at retirementwisdom.com

References

Lisa Greenwald, Craig Copeland, and Jack VanDerhei, “The 2017 Retirement Confidence Survey—Many Workers Lack Retirement Confidence and Feel Stressed About Retirement Preparations,” EBRI Issue Brief, no. 431 (Employee Benefit Research Institute, March 21, 2017).

Are You Headed for a Zombie Retirement?

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By Joe Casey

Is a purposeful retirement life part of your retirement planning? When people think of retirement planning, most focus on the financial side. It’s critical. But retirement is not just about money. It’s also about time. What will your retired life be like?

In my work, I see smart people who nail the financial side, yet put off the non-financial side. They’re financially flying first-class in retirement – but they find themselves living in the equivalent of a middle seat in the last row of coach.

Why?

Because getting it right – on both sides – can appear deceptively simple, but it can be easily put off. Until, you find that you’ve drifted off into retirement. You have enough money, lots of time and, after awhile, more boredom than you expected.

There’s a cost of not planning for both sides of retirement. You could find yourself becoming a zombie.

Different Mindsets

Planning for both sides of the retirement equation takes different mindsets. On the financial side, you have to think conservatively and in a linear fashion. It’s a left-brain thing. Increasingly, many of the investment decisions for retirement tend toward the auto-pilot mode. While it is certainly complex, auto-pilot makes it sound so easy. 

  • Automatic enrollment in a 401(k) plan.
  • Target date funds.
  • Robo Advisers.
  • Passive investing.

Just “set it and forget it.”

The non-financial side is a different animal. It’s more of a right brain thing. You have to think expansively.

  • Creating a vision for your life after your primary career.
  • Rediscovering your life purpose.
  • Adjusting to the loss of your career identity – and crafting a new one.
  • Replacing some of the non-financial benefits that came from work, such as social connectivity.
  • Discovering new and different ways to invest your time.

This work takes imagination and requires equal parts of vulnerability, experimentation and collaboration.

It can be easy to underestimate. After all, how hard can it be? “You mean, I’ll be freed from the daily grind? I’ve got this covered. Golf. Grilling. Netflix and chill. Rinse and repeat. Problem solved. Nirvana.”

Stuck in Vacation Prison?

People feel that they deserve hard-earned time-off once they retire. There’s certainly nothing wrong with that. But problems can creep in when the vacation lasts so long that it perniciously becomes the new normal. A former colleague confided in me that time off was great at first, but then it actually became boring. He was surprised that he found himself feeling that way. After all, it was what it dreamed of for years – not working. But somehow he became “stuck in a vacation prison.” Something was missing. While he did not want to return to his corporate life, he didn’t want to feel like he retired from all of life either. After awhile, the vacation continued, but he was adrift. When every day is Saturday, you realize you’ve ruined Saturdays.

You see them at Starbucks. You see them at the movie theater. They all have that same look in their eyes. Retirement Zombies.

Step Out of Your Comfort Zone and Create Your New Life

There’s a better way that many baby boomers are pursuing, even though it’s been mocked by a New York Times columnist, who advocates a traditional retirement life of moving to Florida and playing mah-jongg and golf.

Let me be clear. There’s certainly nothing wrong with any of those choices, except that they’re not for everyone. Some people want more out of the rest of their lives.

Is that all there is?  Is this what I worked so hard all those years for?

In his excellent book, Falling Upward, Richard Rohr a Franciscan priest, characterizes the second half of life as being about a spiritual transition of connecting to a deeper purpose and meaning in life. It’s more about others, and the contributions you make to the lives of others.

If that’s what you’re after, step out of your comfort zone and augment your financial planning, with a vision of your life in retirement. One that’s right for you, not the prescribed traditional one.

It involves taking stock of areas such as:

  • Life – What’s your true purpose in these next chapters of life? What contributions do you want to make to the lives of others?
  • Love –  What are the things you really love to do? Who are the people you really want to spend more time with? (And not…).
  • Leisure – What are the things you really want to do for enjoyment?
  • Learning – This may be the secret weapon. What new things do you want to learn? What have you always wanted to take up, but never had the time?

If you’re satisfied with checking out to a life of golf, best wishes. In the spirit of full disclosure, I am an unapologetic, non-golfing “ambitious baby boomer”-  exactly the type derided by the Times columnist. But I fervently believe there’s a higher level of active and meaningful, retired life that’s attainable with a bit of thoughtful planning.

Don’t be a zombie. Reach higher.

Joe Casey is an executive coach, who also helps people think through and create their Second Act careers or other meaningful pursuits in retirement, at retirementwisdom.com. He writes for The RW Blog, a retirement planning blog.

What Will Your Life in Retirement Be About?

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By Joe Casey

Some people worry that they’ll be constantly looking for things to do in retirement. That may depend on your outlook. Our head of HR once told an old story that’s always stuck with me. The story was about a traveler in ancient Rome who was walking up a steep hill where he encountered a group of workers scurrying about.

I’m Busy, Man

It was a very busy scene and he decided to inquire about what exactly they were doing. The first worker he asked seemed visibly annoyed about being interrupted and barked “I am cutting stones.” It wasn’t clearly audible, but the traveler thought he heard the worker grumble “Idiot.” The worker clearly wanted to return to his tasks as soon as possible, so the traveler continued up the hill.

All About the Benjamins?

Soon he came across a second worker, who was doing the same tasks. He was also busy, but he appeared a bit friendlier. The traveler asked him the same question. The worker paused, just for a moment, and explained “I am a stonecutter. I traveled many miles here for this work and as soon as I receive my pay next month, I will return home.” The worker then turned his attention back to his work. The traveler thanked him and continued up the hill.

A Bigger Purpose

Toward the top of the hill, he saw a third worker. He was engaged in exactly the same tasks as the other two workers had been. The traveler asked him the same question about what he was doing. The third worker put down his tools, walked over to shake the traveler’s hand, looked him in the eye, smiled broadly and answered: “I am building a cathedral.” He explained “I’ve traveled very far to be part of this team and I miss my family. But I know how important this cathedral will be and how many people will come and worship here. The Bishop shared with us his vision for this place and how many people would benefit for many, many years. Their future depends on the very work we’re doing now.”

Having a clear sense of purpose can completely shift how someone views their work. Is it simply a task, a job or is it possibly something more meaningful, even a calling? What’s different about the third worker is his understanding of the vision and the impact that their collective work will have on others. It puts the same exact tasks in a broader context and there’s a difference in how he describes the work.

Will You Be A Stonecutter in Retirement?

Lately, I’m noticing the same phenomenon with retirement. Much of what I read about planning for retirement, especially early retirement, feels a lot like the first and second workers. There are the key steps to take and tasks to hit. All are good and very important. There’s a big emphasis on the date. It’s reminiscent of Escape from Alcatraz. You can picture the prisoners scratching the number of days on the walls of their cells. There’s more emphasis on what they are retiring from than what they are retiring to. I sense that’s something is missing.

I notice similar things among those who are in retirement. On vacation this week, I hear many people describe themselves as “I’m retired.” When asked a little more about it, their answers focus on activities – on what they do. “A little of this and a little of that” is a common refrain. Travel and Golf are others. Other retirees, like the second worker, describe themselves based on their personal or professional roles. “I’m a grandfather. I’m a volunteer. I’m a writer. I’m a teacher part-time. 

But I notice something different about a third group. It’s the smallest, but they describe things that they are engaged in that seem to have a deeper meaning to them. What I notice in those people is they talk less about themselves and more about others. Less about themselves and more about how what they are engaged in and how it helps others. It’s anecdotal, but I’d say this last group seems happier. They remind me of the third worker.

Your Move

Each retirement is unique. How about you? How are you thinking about your retirement? Are you thinking of it as something you’ll do, a specific role or something that has a meaningful purpose to you and an impact on others?

Forced into Retirement? Strengthen those Social Ties

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by Denis Wuestman

There are many things that can go through your mind if circumstances beyond your control lead you to be forced into early retirement. Your first reaction may be to “start looking for another job”. Understandable. However, depending on demand for your skills, you may discover that the job that you were used to doing may not be there for you again. Maybe work, during this next stage, takes a different form. To help with this transition, one of the most important things you can do is to maintain and strengthen your personal network.

The Benefits of a Network

The extent of a person’s social network can play a significant factor in helping guide a successful transition, both personally and professionally.   From a personal perspective, building relationships can help your focus on “what is next” as you talk to others who have experienced what you have. Simple conversations and connections can ease the solitary nature of this phase. Spending time with people you like can also help bring significant meaning to this part of your life.   Finally, potential job ideas can also come from these conversations.

Tip for Maintaining and/or Starting a New Network

If you are in a situation where you recently left work here are some simple tips for maintaining a social network with your professional connections:

  1. Create an “A-list” of the people that you want to stay in touch with. These are trusted colleagues who impact you positively.
  2. Reach out to them to arrange a lunch or a cup of coffee etc.…(I prefer this over lengthy emails and/or phone calls)
  3. When you meet – it’s important to be yourself and not just focus on looking for a job. Put yourself in their shoes. These are your “A” list of key people from your work life and you ideally may wish to maintain these relationships for a long time.   I suggest considering the following but being authentic rules in all cases:
    • Show an interest in their lives, both work and personal
    • Discuss your situation and ask what advice they might have for you
    • If they make suggestions to help you, be honest with them as to if you will follow-up
    • Once you do try what they suggest – send them a note thanking them and tell them what happened
    • Make a point to stay in touch. People get real busy and you don’t want to appear annoying. I recommend practicing “respectful contact” with regard to frequency. This will vary from individual to individual but I found that people, who are interested in you, and you in them, do not mind hearing about your progress.   Progress is the keyword – you are taking actions to move forward and not waiting for them to do it for you.

At the same time, focus on creating a fresh network so you can add some balance to your social circles and your life. This can help you branch out and perhaps uncover new activities, friends, and yes, even work. Here are some ideas to pursue:

  1. Assess the things you like doing that make you feel good. This could include leisure, exercise, helping others, reading, seeing old friends…..
  2. Once you have your list – pick 1 or 2 things that you would look forward to doing with others. Here are some thoughts that may help you:
    • Join a book club
    • Make a date(s) with friends to do something regularly
    • Volunteer at a soup kitchen, school, hospital
    • Look at non-profits in your area and see if the skills you have matched any of the gaps they are looking for.  This may sound like a stretch but I know someone that found a full-time job this way
    • Go out to dinner with spouses
  3. Start taking action. Set a time to discover more or start an activity. The key here is to try something.

Attitude Is Your Friend

Your attitude will ultimately determine the end result.   This next phase is a new opportunity in many ways for anyone forced into retirement if it is embraced that way. Things may have changed, but this next phase can become a time of exploration and further growth.  Your social network can be a big assist and provide enjoyment and engagement with people you like along the way.

We have a coaching program geared toward people who are forced to retire earlier than planned.

So, What Do You Do?

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By Joe Casey

We’ve all heard this question. It’s a simple one. This is not of one of life’s most challenging problems. But it can be an instructive part of your transition to retirement. It’s really about giving yourself time to adjust to – and to own – a new identity. For some it’s even an identity crisis of sorts.

Are We What We Do?

We tend to answer that question effortlessly. ‘I’m an accountant.’ ‘I’m a carpenter.’  ‘I’m a teacher.’ Or ‘I work at Global Mega Corp.’ We describe ourselves by what we do for a living or where we do it. In our society, a lot of attention is placed on what we do. But, of course, we’re much more than our jobs.

Don’t Get Wrapped Up In Titles 

Long, long ago and far, far away, in my 20’s, I went to grad school at night for six years (My daughter asked if I was in the slow class). Hands down, the best course I had was taught by an adjunct professor who had just retired as the CEO of a company in Philadelphia. One night, he shared an observation with us that I’ve always remembered. It seemed like it was a painful one for him to share. He advised us not to become wrapped up in titles, offices and perks that come with different jobs. He said that it’s easy to get your self-image too intertwined with them. He warned us to be careful because the jobs, titles, offices, and perks all go away.  Don’t confuse your job with who you are. Sound advice from someone who sounded like he had learned it the hard way.

What’s interesting is how different this question feels when you’ve just retired or you’re in the middle of figuring out a transition to whatever is next. What used to be an effortless response, is now replaced by hesitation. ‘Well, I used to…”.

For some people, this question is a non-issue. ‘I’m retired. I play golf 7 days a week!”

It Takes Time to Adjust

For others, it can be a challenge at first. When I retired from my corporate career, I noticed the hesitation. Awkward. My identity was rooted in what I had done for the past 29 years. It took a while to try on and get used to what I was doing in my next chapter. As time went by,  I became much more comfortable in my answer. As I look back on that period, now almost nine years ago, I can see that I needed to give myself time to grow into a new view of myself – and to own it.

Interestingly, my answer evolved into one that no longer solely defined myself by my job. ‘Well, I do a lot of different things. I do X, I do Y and I especially love doing Z. How about you?’

(As an aside, I have noticed that sometimes people really aren’t listening when they ask So What Do You Do? They’re often thinking of what to ask or say next. I once tested this, answering ‘I’m an undercover circus clown’, which was greeted by a ‘Oh, that’s nice.’ To which I responded, “Yes, but it’s a lot more difficult than people think.”).

Four suggestions to keep in mind:

1. Give yourself time to transition

  Be patient with yourself. Be curious about how you feel about where you’re headed.

2. Explain yourself beyond a job

 Think multi-dimensionally. Think about the things you’re getting involved or with interested in exploring. Include the other roles in your life.

3. Gauge your level of comfort

 Notice when you’re starting to feel more comfortable. Pay attention to what that may be telling you about where you are in your journey.

4. Own your new identity

Let go of what you used to do. Think of yourself in new terms and embrace what you’re doing.

Listen to our retirement transition podcast with interviews with authors, experts, and retirees creating interesting lives in retirement.