by Corey Keyes
What will your life really be like when you retire? It’s a big transition and it often kicks off with a honeymoon period where people experience a delightful sense of freedom from the working life they’ve lived for decades. But all honeymoons come to an end. Then what? Some people who haven’t prepared well for the non-financial side of retirement share that they feel adrift, disconnected and disoriented. They lack a sense of purpose and direction that pickleball and golf won’t making up for.
Languishing is a psychological state between flourishing and depression, which feels like emptiness, stagnation, and lack of drive and motivation. Corey Keyes, a Professor Emeritus of Sociology at Emory University, coined this term to highlight the prevalence of this middle ground where people can struggle with their well-being. This feeling of languishing can negatively impact your daily life, enjoyment, activity level and your overall life satisfaction.
In Languishing: How to Feel Alive Again in a World That Wears Us Down details what languishing is and what it feels like, along with his assessment to ascertain if you are languishing. The heart of the book is his research-backed “prescription” of five vitamins to help you move from languishing to flourishing. It’s a group of activities that I notice are part of the active, fulfilling retirements I see my clients creating. The activities begin with following your curiosity to learn new things and “rewriting your self-narrative through personal growth.” Next up is cultivating meaningful connections and relationships. The third vitamin is developing your relationship with the spiritual side of life, followed by identifying and living with purpose. Keyes notes that it’s not enough to have a sense of purpose in life, you have to live it. And finally, the fifth vitamin is play – rediscovering joy and fun. This is the area my clients consistently score lowest on in an early Designing Your Exercise. Keyes makes another distinction in describing this vitamin, noting that all leisure is not created equal. Active leisure offers greater value and benefits than passive leisure.
Corey Keyes is a pioneering researcher sharing practical empirically-based solutions that promote flourishing in life. While it’s no substitute for people who should seeking professional support for mental health, his five vitamins offer a roadmap that can kickstart an active and balanced retirement life.
Listen to my podcast conversation with Corey Keyes
Read Languishing: How to Feel Alive Again in a World That Wears Us Down
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