Retirement Wisdom’s Joe Casey is quoted in this piece by Patrick Hruby for The Atlantic’s Re:think series sponsored by Equitable on how the pandemic is affecting retirement planning
One Family’s Return to Intergenerational Living
By Bev Bachel
As you head into retirement, one of the biggest decisions you’ll have to make is where you are going to live. Many opt for retirement communities but increasingly people are choosing to live with younger members of their own families.
According to Marc Freedman, founder of Encore.org and author of How to Live Forever: The Enduring Power of Connecting the Generations, that choice could be the secret to fulfillment and happiness as we live longer lives.
But intergenerational living doesn’t just benefit those in retirement; it benefits family members of all ages. That’s why Robert and Kay Joslin are so delighted to be reunited under one roof with their daughter Jamie and her young family.
Together for the good of all
For the Joslins, intergenerational living is nothing new. They’d done it years ago with the generation before them.
“Kay’s dad had polio in the 1950s and was in a wheelchair most of his adult life,” explains Robert. “When Kay’s mom had a stroke, we all agreed it was time for the two of them to come to Texas and live with us and our daughter Jamie, who was 10 at the time.”
So, Robert and Kay designed and built a home where all three generations could live together. Kay, who had already left her career as a petroleum engineer, was the primary caregiver for her parents and Jamie, while Robert continued to work full-time.
“That experience was invaluable,” says Robert. “It taught us all the value of different perspectives and about the importance of respect and understanding.”
But eventually Kay’s parents died, Jamie moved to Minneapolis to attend college, and Robert and Kay became empty nesters.
Full circle
Fast forward 10 years. By then, Jamie was married to Randy Millard and living in Minneapolis. When the couple announced their pregnancy in 2014, Robert and Kay decided it was time to join them. In less than 10 weeks, they sold their Texas home and bought a new one just a mile away from Jamie and Randy.
Shortly after, Kay once again became the primary caregiver, this time for her granddaughter Robin, while Robert, Jamie and Randy worked full-time. And while they hadn’t had any serious conversations about when they would merge households, all four were certain it would happen … someday.
That day came sooner than expected when Jamie, at 31, was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis the same month she learned she was pregnant with her second child.
“We always knew our two families would live together, but after Dani’s birth there were days when I couldn’t even change a diaper or button the girls’ clothes, so our ‘someday’ plan became a two-year plan.”
The four adults discussed what they wanted and needed in their new shared home. Jamie and Randy both needed offices, while Kay insisted on a walk-out basement, ideally with a kitchenette so that she and Robert, both early risers, could enjoy a cup of coffee without disturbing other family members.
Robert even created a spreadsheet to help each person prioritize what was most important to him or her.
A smart financial decision
One of their first, and most important, steps was meeting with a financial planner. “We knew our goal of living together would never work if we couldn’t talk candidly about money, including how much we make and how we hope to spend it,” says Robert, who still works full-time.
“We are also very clear that it’s not the Joslin’s money or the Millard’s money, but our money.”
That’s one reason why, when they purchased their new home, all four adults put their names on the home’s title. It’s also why they continue to talk openly about what aging well means to them, as well as their goals, including financial independence.
“Buying a house together was definitely a smart financial decision,” says Jamie. “Daycare for two kids costs $24,000 to $30,000 a year. And if my mom and dad had to move into an assisted living facility, that would cost another $5,000 a month—for each of them.”
Family time is priceless
While the financial benefits of living together are huge, it’s the ordinary, everyday moments that everyone appreciates the most.
“I got off a conference call the other day and walked out of my office to find my dad playing Monopoly with my daughter Robin, while Dani sat in her highchair watching,” says Jamie. “I could have cried! They were playing with the exact same set my grandparents and I used to play with when I was a kid. Seeing that brought back a flood of memories and made me realize just how blessed my family truly is.”
Of course, there are challenges. “Yeah, we fight,” says Jamie. “Yeah, there’s tension. But the positives definitely outweigh the negatives. For instance, the girls are learning that there’s not just one way of doing things but multiple ways.”
Robert agrees: “Things were great before we moved in together, and they’re even better now that we’re once again a three-generation household raising a family, cooking and gardening together, sharing childcare, pooling our resources and making memories that will last a lifetime.”
Bev Bachel is a freelance writer and the author of What Do You Really Want? How to Set a Goal and Go for It! A Guide for Teens. As a child, she enjoyed having her grandmother live with her family most winters.
__________________________________________
Related Podcast Episodes You May Like
Why People Make a Career Change with Purpose Top of Mind – Chris Farrell
The Exciting Potential of Intergenerational Mentoring – Charlotte Japp
How to Change Lanes to a Second Career
By Bev Bachel
Trout Lowen went from freelance writing and editing to selling real estate.
Lynn Barber pivoted from managing a work comp claims center for a Fortune 500 insurance company to teaching residents in her community how to build sustainable gardens.
Barry Scanlan transitioned from serving as a school district crisis response coordinator to being a visual artist.
Laurie Gilbert rotated from managing the production of intricate pop-up books to designing her own line of dishware and jewelry.
Otis Zanders shifted from being the warden of a correctional facility to serving as the president and CEO of a nonprofit dedicated to reducing criminal recidivism among African-American young men.
How did these individuals safely and smoothly change lanes into their new careers?
They did it the same way you can: by following this seven-step process recommended by Catherine Byers Breet. A former high-tech recruiter who launched her own business in order to change lanes from speaking to coaching, Byers Breet is on a mission “to help one million people love what they do for a living.”
Step 1: Look back for happiness.
Plot all the jobs you’ve had and rank them from 1-10, with 10 being “loved it” and 1 being “hated it.” Then, look back at the jobs you loved and identify the specific activities you enjoyed. Coaching team members? Being creative? Diving deep into a problem on your own? Collaborating with others? Finding solutions to nagging problems? Raising money for a cause you believe in? Also identify the activities you hated.
Step 2: Look ahead for fulfillment.
If money wasn’t a concern, what work would you do? What work wouldn’t you do? If you didn’t have to worry about having the right skills or enough talent, what would you try? Who might you partner with? Who would you choose to avoid? Also think about life priorities, such as family, friends, health and making a difference in your community. Identifying your values can help. So can keeping in mind that what may have been fulfilling in the past may not be so moving forward.
Step 3: Define your non-negotiables.
Now that you’ve gotten in touch with what you’ve enjoyed and what you’ve disliked or perhaps even hated about your previous jobs, it’s time to home in on your non-negotiables. “When I was 33, I had two kids in diapers, a bedridden mother and a dad who had just had a massive stroke,” says Byers Breet. “I was caring for all four so two of my non-negotiables at that time were minimal travel and a flexible work schedule.” Now, her parents are gone and her kids are in high school so if she were job hunting, her non-negotiables would likely focus more on salary requirements so that she can reach her family’s college savings and retirement goals.
Step 4: Spear your fear.
List what you’re afraid of. For some people, it may be lack of money or job security; for others, it may be loss of respect or inability to influence others. “But don’t stop at surface fears,” says Byers Breet. Instead, dig deep to uncover the tight-in-chest, butterflies-in-the-stomach, worst-case scenario fears that lie two or three or even a dozen layers beneath the surface. Then, once you’ve identified your fears, assess the likelihood of each fear becoming real and develop a plan for addressing it.
Step 5: Identify the gaps.
Now that you know what you want and better understand skills, qualifications and education required, what gaps exist? Are they real or perceived? If real, can you fill them by gaining experience as a volunteer or going back to school? Barber, claims center manager turned sustainable garden guru, did both things, first volunteering as master gardener, then eventually earning a master’s degree in environmental horticulture. Bridge jobs also offer a way to pick up industry experience or develop new skills.
Step 6: Research the market.
What jobs are out there? What do they pay? What skills and experience are required? Who’s hiring? How do they feel about older workers? Is a college degree required? Are part-time options available?
Step 7: Start networking.
“Surprisingly, this can be the most terrifying step of all for many people,” says Byers Breet. “But you really can’t consider changing careers unless you’re willing to talk to people in the new field or industry you want to be a part of.” Use the conversations to ask for advice and introductions to others who may be willing to help or advise.
Follow these seven steps and you, too, can safely and successfully change lanes to a fulfilling and purpose-filled second career.
Bev Bachel is a freelance writer and editor, and the author of What Do You Really Want? How to Set a Goal and Go for It. A lifelong goal-setter, she’s tapped into the power of goalsetting to sell Girl Scout cookies, stay connected to her four sisters and make new friends. One of her second-career goals? To work on a podcast.
Related Retirement Wisdom Podcast Episodes
How to Make a Wise Career Switch – Dawn Graham
From the NBA Hardwood to the Altar – Steve Javie
How to Build a Non-Profit Encore Career – Betsy Werley
Navigating An Unexpected Career Change – Maggie Craddock
Take the Detour – A Second Act Career Story – Melissa Davey
Will You Be an Entrepreneur in Your Second Act Career? – Dorie Clark
Medicare 101
By Dan Petkevich
In the same way that you put on layers before going outside on a cold day, you put on layers of health insurance when it comes to Medicare. And just like you wouldn’t put your coat on before your undershirt, there’s an order to these layers of health insurance.
Your First Layer: Part A
- Covers – Hospitalization, skilled nursing care, and hospice. Full coverage for the first 60 days in a hospital after a $1,408 deductible is paid. After the 60th day, you pay $352 per day. After the 91st day, you pay $704 per day. After the 150th day, you pay all expenses.
- Premium – None, if Social Security tax has been withheld from your paycheck for at least ten years. Otherwise there’s a premium.
- Provided by – The federal government
- When To Enroll – Three months before your 65th birthday up to three months after
- How to Enroll – You’re automatically enrolled if you’re collecting social security. Otherwise go to www.medicare.gov.
- Employer Coverage & Delaying Enrollment – Most people enroll in Part A even if they’re covered by their or their spouse’s employer. The main reasons people delay enrolling in Part A are if they haven’t paid Social Security taxes for ten years and therefore need to pay a premium for Part A or if they have an HSA account.
Your Second Layer: Part B
- Covers – Out-Patient care and doctor’s charges in a hospital. Examples of Out-Patient care are a check-up, X-Ray, blood test, or a simple elective procedure. After meeting an annual deductible of $198, Part B covers 80% of expenses, and you pay the remaining 20%.
- Premium – If your individual tax return shows income of $87,000 (or $174,000 for a joint tax return), or less, your Part B premium is $144.60 a month. If your income is higher, your premium will be as well. You can find a chart of Part B premiums as they vary with income at www.medicare.gov.
- Provided by – The federal government
- When To Enroll – Three months before your 65th birthday up to three months after
- How to Enroll – You’re automatically enrolled if you’re collecting Social Security. Otherwise go to www.medicare.gov.
- Employer Coverage & Delaying Enrollment – Because everyone pays Part B premium, more people consider delaying enrollment in it if they have sufficient coverage from their or their spouse’s employer. The employer’s HR staff will let you know if you can delay enrollment in Part B. If you delay enrolling in Part B and don’t have sufficient employer coverage, you will face financial penalties in the future.
A Quick Pause Before Adding More Layers
Parts A and B together are referred to as “Original Medicare”, and while they satisfy the minimum medical coverage the government requires you to have, many folks find they have gaps in the following areas:
- Part A Deductible – The Part A deductible resets once you’ve been out of the hospital for 60 days. So if you go to the hospital several times, each time 60 days since the last one, you’ll pay a $1,408 deductible each time. This could add up.
- Part B Coinsurance – After you meet the Part B deductible, you pay 20% of Part B covered care. 20% of a large number can be a large number.
- Excess Charges – Healthcare providers will occasionally charge more than Medicare will reimburse them. The difference is called an “excess charge”, and you pay for all of it.
- Foreign Travel – Original Medicare doesn’t cover healthcare received abroad except for a few limited cases in Canada and Mexico.
Further, the government requires you to have Prescription Drug Coverage, also referred to as “Part D”. Time to put on some more layers.
More Layers: Medigap, Medicare Advantage, and Prescription Drug Coverage
If you’re fine with the coverage provided by Original Medicare (Parts A and B), you can purchase an additional Prescription Drug Plan from a private insurance carrier (Part D), and you will have met the minimum amount of health insurance the government requires you to carry.
If you want additional coverage to “fill the gaps” in Original Medicare, you have two options:
Medigap Plan (Medicare Supplement)
If you’ve ever heard of “Plan G” or “Plan F”, you’ve heard of Medigap plans. They pick up the bill after Original Medicare pays. So if you got a blood test that costs $100, Part B will cover $80, and if your Medigap plan covers Part B coinsurance, it’ll cover all or part of the remaining $20.
Medigap plans are defined by the government but offered by private carriers. This means that the benefits of Plan G offered by Humana and Cigna are the same.The premium, however, will likely be different. Medigap premium is paid in addition to Medicare Part B premium.
The different Medigap benefits are listed on www.medicare.gov. Though there are ten options, four or five can usually be ruled out because, surprisingly, they cost more than other Medigap options with more coverage. The Medigap plan with the most comprehensive coverage that’s currently available to new Medicare enrollees is Plan G.
Should you choose a Medigap plan, you also need to purchase a Prescription Drug Plan. I am happy to discuss which Medigap plan might be a good fit for you.
Medicare Advantage Plans
Unlike Medigap Plans, Medicare Advantage plans are entirely defined and run by private carriers. They typically have you pay a copayment (a flat fee) or coinsurance (a percent of the total costs) for In-Patient and Out-Patient care until your medical payments for the calendar year reach an “out-of-pocket maximum”, at which point the plan covers all your expenses. Out-of-pocket maximums depend on the plan and typically range from $4,000 to $8,000.
Medicare Advantage plans are typically offered as HMOs or PPOs. In the HMO model, you can only see doctors in the HMO, and you must get a referral from your primary care physician to see a specialist. This is in contrast to Original Medicare or Medigap, which allow you to see any doctor who accepts Medicare.
In the PPO model, Medicare Advantage plans let you see out of network doctors, but provide less coverage when you do so. If you choose the Medicare Advantage route, be sure it covers your preferred healthcare providers.
Unlike Medigap plans, Medicare Advantage plans come bundled with prescription drug coverage, so there’s no need to purchase a separate Prescription Drug Plan. Be sure a Medicare Advantage plan covers your prescriptions before enrolling in it.
Choosing Between Medigap and Medicare Advantage
To compare any plans, you must consider their total cost for the year: their premium plus your share of the year’s expected healthcare bills.
Depending on the plans available in your zip code, a Medicare Advantage plan might make more sense than a Medigap plan, or vice versa. I can help you compare different plans in your area.
Fortunately, there is an “escape hatch” for folks who enroll in a Medicare Advantage plan and are unhappy. If you enroll in a Medicare Advantage plan when you turn 65, you may switch to a Medigap plan for any reason during the first year.
Dan Petkevich is CEO & Founder, Fair Square Medicare. He can be reached at [email protected]
This article originally appeared on Fair Square Medicare and was reprinted with permission.
Podcast Episodes You May Like
What Are The Keys To A Successful Retirement? Fritz Gilbert
Retirement Planning Includes Getting Good at Getting Older – Rabbi Laura Geller
What Will Your Narrative Be?
By Joe Casey
What will your narrative be for your retirement life? Well, it just might be taking shape these days, whether you’re aware of it or not. Like most people, I have more time to reflect on my daily walks. And I’ve been thinking about the power of stories lately. The stories we tell others and the stories we are living right now.
There’s a wealth of wisdom that often goes untapped. It lives in the life stories of older generations. Last week we interviewed Thelma Reese, the co-author of How Seniors Are Saving the World. She shared the story of Benita Cooper, a young architect in Philadelphia who created an organization around stories. The mission is to help older adults share stories of their lives with younger generations. It’s called The Best Day of My Life So Far, and it’s uplifting.
What Happens to The Hero’s Journey in Retirement?
Then there is the story we’re creating of our own lives. I’ve been thinking a lot about a recent piece by Arthur C. Brooks in The Atlantic Why So Many People Are Unhappy in Retirement?
Brooks notes that many of us may (consciously or unconsciously) follow a life script known as the Hero’s Journey. He explains the three parts of the journey: the calling, the ordeal, and the hard-won victory. He points out that for many people, it’s the lack of a fourth part that is troublesome. After the win, heading into retirement, the question becomes: What Now?
Brooks believes that the solution lies in letting go of the hero’s narrative. He advises developing a new script that better fits the realities of life in retirement. And he adds that others are watching. He concludes:
“If you’re still in the middle of your hero’s journey, it would behoove you to make tangible plans now to show true strength and character in the final phase. Plan to spend the last part of your life serving others, loving your family and friends, and being a good example to those still in the first three stages of their own hero’s journey. Happiness in retirement depends on your choice of narrative.”
Your Narrative in the Pandemic
Adversity tests us. It can be crippling, and it can make us stronger. Each day we see real-life heroes in different lines of work on the front lines grappling with the coronavirus. These courageous people are inspiring and often underappreciated. They are serving others bravely and displaying strength and character.
The continuing challenge of living with the pandemic is wearing on people. In recent days, I’ve overheard an increasing number of conversations of people complaining about life in the lockdown. I live in one of the hardest-hit states. There’s a lot of impatience with the pace of the phased reopening plans and criticism of state officials. The complaining was of the first-world variety. Restrictions at the beach. Regulations that were constricting plans for graduation and birthday parties. When I heard these complaints there were always teenagers and children around. I wondered what impact they were having on how they view this time we’re living through. What stories will they tell years from now?
And it occurred to me that we are all shaping a narrative for ourselves in this pandemic. And others are watching.
I was listening to the author Michael Lewis on The Bill Simmons Podcast, talking about how he has been impressed with how his teenage children have been handling the pandemic. He shared that their children’s attitude has been, “How are we going to beat the pandemic today?’
I’m not one who thinks the pandemic is a good test run for retirement. With one exception: it’s an excellent opportunity to practice choosing your narrative. What’s your choice? Complaining – or how are we going to beat the pandemic today?
The One-Legged Man
My wife Pat has been delivering Meals on Wheels for about 25 years. She began volunteering when our eldest daughter started kindergarten. When COVID-19 hit, I pleaded with her to stop her route for a while as a precaution. All four of our children, who are now 18 to 31, did the same.
Four weeks in, I showed her an article in our local paper that the organization had recruited local college students to fill in for older volunteers. She continued to be unfazed by my pleas. The following week, as I began my pitch, she snapped at me. She explained why she was not giving up her route. On her assigned route is an older gentleman Greg, who depends on Meals on Wheels, perhaps more than most. He was an amputee. He called himself the One-Legged Man. She said that there was no way she was going to step away from helping him. (Mike drop).
And that’s the story I’ll remember from the pandemic. I hope that’s the one our children to tell our future grandchildren.
What does this all have to do with life after retirement?
Well, the attitude we bring to it may be our most valuable asset, as Bev Bachel writes. And it’s forged in times like these.
Choose wisely.
Joe Casey is a former senior HR leader at Merrill Lynch, who is in his second act as an executive coach and retirement coach. You can hear Joe on The Retirement Wisdom Podcast, where thought leaders and retirees share their wisdom on creating a fulfilling life in retirement from a non-financial perspective.